In Celebration of International Doula Month: A Mother’s Letter To Her Doula

13 May

Dear Ellie,

It has been three months since my daughter’s birth. I have been blessed and delighted with motherhood. I enjoy her tremendously and therefore I have neglected the rest of the world. I have been meaning to write and let you know how wonderful it was for my daughter and me that you were our doula. We are so glad we chose you to be with us for such a precious, intimate, soul piercing moment-the birth of my daughter. I wanted to take the time to thank you for your care and concern about my well being during labor. Starting with your massages, they were soothing and invigorating. I loved your rocking me. It produced in me a sense of calmness. You seemed to have known when to talk to me to keep me focused on my daughter’ birth.

Alexandr Vasilyev/Dol

Alexandre Vasilyev/DollarPhotoClub


You facilitated communication between my doctor and my nurses. At times I was out of it emotionally and physically that medical explanations had little meaning to me. You clarified, explained, asked questions and kept my interest at heart. You made a “dysfunctional labor”, as my doctor labeled it, functional. My doctor spoke highly of you and so did my family. My husband was so happy that you were there because it allowed him to relax and enjoy the process. He told me he trusted you implicitly.

Your hospital visit after the birth was deeply appreciated. I was feeling so overwhelmed and helpless by the ordeal of a cesarean , trying to breastfeed, changing diapers, answering phone calls and trying to be graceful to my visitors. Your tips on organization and breastfeeding proved successful. Ellie, there was a sincere, loving level of care that you incorporated within your professional knowledge that mad it easier for me to learn the techniques.

Your home visit was a delight. You helped me to give my newborn daughter her first bath and walked me gently through it allowing me to lose the fear of hurting her. Yes, God danced the day she was born and all the beings of this universe welcomed her to her home. I am bursting with pride, joy and love for my daughter. Lastly, I must thank you for the list of reading material you recently sent me. Ellie, I couldn’t have endured 28 hours of labor without your loving care and support.

I am so happy you were there. We all thank you. Thank you for writing what took place when I gave birth to my daughter. I shall keep that account for her.

Love, M.

Many thanks to my friend and colleague, Ellie Shea, for sharing this letter.

One Response to “In Celebration of International Doula Month: A Mother’s Letter To Her Doula”

  1. Sashii July 20, 2015 at 1:37 am #

    Your midwife sounds like a beautiful presence. I myself, have just accomplished vbac and I have to say to all that it is completely worth it. Only 17months after my csection I gave birth to my son ( with the help of an epidural ) but overall it was the best. So many doctors try to force repeat cesareans on women and it’s honestly unfair. My midwife was beautiful as well and completely supportive. Vbac is the way to go.

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